Psychoanalysis: The next years

2012. Later this year, me and my six hundred some peers will be graduating from high school. Tomorrow will be March. 3 months have already gone by this year which means that there's only technically 3 more months until it's all over. Only 3 more months left and yet I'm still undecided on not only a college but also a career.

When we were younger, it was okay to want to become a teacher or a musician or an Olypmpic athlte. It was okay and even encouraged to chase those dreams. I don't know when it was, but there was a point in time when those dreams morphed into reality. I always dreamt of becoming an Olympic volleyball player. I know of senior students who would make fantastic teachers but aren't pursuing that career because they know it's exceptionally difficult to land a job after college. However, I do know students who are going into college with the intent of majoring in education because they know that's what they will succeed in. Although I'm 110% supportive of those kids and their motives, I do understand where the first group of students are coming from.

Ostensibly, the nation (as well as the world) has recently been struggling economically. Our nation's leaders have failed to pull us out of debt and it's affecting everyone. As incomes significantly drop, college tuition continues to rise. Gas prices are increasing and for the most part increased taxes are hitting Americans hard. A lot of high school seniors (myself very much included) are currently feeling the pressure to get on the right track now. Even though I hear things like "follow your dreams" and "don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something" I still hear voices in my head telling me to do the more realistic things. Don't act. Don't teach. Don't become an audio engineer; even that doesn't pay enough. These thoughts...are they my own? Are they my parents'? Are they society's? What should I DO?

My parents told me to find a path on which I would be successful. Whatever it may be, whether or not it's my dream, ensure the utmost success out of it. I find conflict here: what if my dream is to play international volleyball for the rest of my life? I mean, I'm not going to lie. I have thought about that. But then I have to ask myself like I was taught: will I be successful at it? That much I cannot guarantee. So here I am declaring a psychology and international relations major and minor respectively, hoping to become a successful child psychiatrist. Hopefully I'll find ways to play volleyball and travel when I'm not in a therapy session.

I know these times are tough and I don't even have a steady job or a family to support. I only hope that I can come to terms with what I have learned from my parent's advice and society confines while simultaneously remembering what I've wanted to pursue since 5th grade.

Biopreparedness and Xenophobia

Humans and animals alike are biologically prone to developing certain sensory aversions in association with various conditioned responses. In my psychology textbook was an example of humans generally associating sudden shock/pain with external stimuli such as lights and sounds. In contrast, humans typically associate physical illness such as nausea with intrisic stimuli such as food or water. These associations make humans more prepared for survival. For example, someone who gets food poisoning from spoiled Chinese food is more likely to not eat food that smells like just like it, therefore decreasing the likelihood of getting food poisoning a second time. Someone who has never eaten spoiled food is at a higher risk of food poisoning because they have never smelled or tasted spoiled food. This represents biopreparedness at its best.

Not only do humans learn taste aversions, but aversions to certain environmental stimuli as well. The idea that motivated me to write this blog post was the concept of people learning to fear members of different ethnic groups. Upon mild research, I found the idea of xenophobia, or the fear of foreigners (and more specifically to those of different cultural groups than your own) intriguing. At first read, the idea seems laughable. A fear of foreigners? Pshh. But really, taking the concept more generally, I don't think it's necessarily the fear of foreigners as it is the fear of foreign ideas.

Someone of a different skin tone assumes a different background which assumes different experiences which ultimately assumes different ideas and perspectives. How much in common does an Italian-American have in common with an Asian-American? Skin tone, hair color, eye color, height, build, and a lot of other physical features. But that's it. So why would there be any barrier be present between the two? Why at my school cafeteria do I see a table of ten Asian-American kids seperated by a table of ten Polish-American kids seperated by a table of ten Latino-American kids? In my opinion, it's not because our school is discriminatory or racist and it's not because those students are 'fearful' of the other students. It's because anyone would naturally prefer to live in a comfortable environment surrounded by people who share common interests, ideas, experiences, and outlooks on life.

Fret not. We aren't living in a xenophobic America. In a stereotypical high school setting, the artsy kids, Asian kids, jocks, nerds, and other labeled groups typically surround themselves with members of their respective groups because they have that much in common. Creating friendships which overlap such groups are certainly present, but I would think that initiating such a friendship starts with some degree of 'fear' of clashing ideas.

It would be false of me to assume that my Filipino self has nothing in common with someone of an Irish background. Xenophobia is exactly that: a phobia. It's something that can and should be overcome. It's the only way for barriers to break and acceptance to grow.

Olfaction and Memory

Our sense of smell triggers memory greater than any of our other four senses. The olfactory cortex is located in the limbic system near the amygdala, the brain structure which stores our emotion. I was thinking about the power of my sense of smell on Monday, the day when the weather decided to make a sudden transition from 20degrees the day before to 57 degrees. I know the weather isn't exactly an attractive topic of discussion but it was captivating enough to make me break down.

When I got home from school, I got out of the car and suddenly the environment smelled all too familiar: it smelled like spring. When I took in a deep breath, my lungs weren't attacked by the sting of cold air and the tip of my nose wasn't frozen. Rather, I took a deep breath and I could practically smell the leaves on the trees, the pollen from the flowers, the grass, the sun, and the everything that was Mother Nature. Suddenly, images of my past spun through my head. One of the things I thought about was how I should be at lacrosse practice. Freshman and sophmore year I played lacrosse, a spring sport, and that day after school smelled just like it did everyday after school on the field.

The sense of smell is one of the most powerful senses and one of the most important to me. With it I can smell the pancakes my dad makes in the morning, my mother's perfume, the natural scent of pine (which is amazing), and it provides me with the ultimate power to remember.

2 eyes, 1 mirror

So for psychology class I had a new assignment: to sit down in front of a mirror and look at myself for 20 minutes. Then I had to write about my experience including thoughts I had about myself, who I see myself as, where I think my future is headed, yadayada. So when I did this exercise, I didn't think I would get anything out of it. I thought I would stop myself after the first minute upon feeling uncomfortable. But (bear with me here), when I looked into my eyes for so long, there was a point when I realized I was looking at a stranger. I felt as if I didn't even recognize the person staring back. Is this really me?, I thought. Then, Is this who I want to be?

I'm not sure if my eyes got me, or if it was just staring at my reflection for so long that I became a stranger to myself. Either way, through this unorthodox assignment, I came to a conclusion that I don't self-reflect enough. Sure, I think about what others think of me (even though I know sometimes I shouldn't) and I think of where I want to be in 10 years, but I've never looked in the mirror and encountered myself before. It was just an overall odd yet somewhat enlightening experience that I thought I should share. Give it a try. I hadn't believed in the saying before, but maybe eyes really are the windows into our own souls...

The Happiness Project by Gretchin Rubin

A lot of us make new year resolutions we can't keep: eat healthier, work out more, be nice. At the beginning of the year it starts out well and we think we actually have a chance of attaining our goals for the rest of the year. But after the third week of going to the gym or eating solely a banana and yogurt for breakfast, it slowly dies down. Why make a resolution that can't be kept? The problem with these kinds of resolutions: specificity. What I learned from reading The Happiness Project is that if you're really determined, being specific actually does helps you achieve your goals.

"A 'happiness project' is an approach to changing your life," (Rubin xvii). Gretchin Rubin is a writer living in upstate New York who last year decided to start a "happiness project". Her project serves the dual purpose of creating a grateful sentiment and positive outlook on life. "I had everything I could possibly want, yet I was failing to appreciate it," (2). In this book, Rubin refers to Benjamin Franklin's virtues and uses them as somewhat of a template for her project. For example, January's resolution was to boost energy. She then chose 5 things that would help her boost her energy: going to sleep earlier, working out better, tossing, storing, and reorganizing, tackling a nagging task, and finally acting more energetic. In the book, throughout the chapter "January" she would go into depth the details of those 5 points and how she was going to accomplish them. Once February rolled around she would do February's resolution in addition to January's and likewise she would keep adding on with the ensuing months so that by December she would be working on all the 11 other month's resolutions.

I thought this project was an interesting idea. Rubin clearly isn't a depressed woman but rather someone who would like to appreciate everything life has to offer her. If Plato and Thoreau explained that the quest for happiness is at the essence of all humans, then why shouldn't I make an effort now to be as happy and grateful as can be? This year I will be off to college starting a new chapter in my life. I don't want to be unhappy and certainly not ungrateful. Plus, having a little project of my own is fun and different and makes me think that this year I will be able to sustain my resolutions throughout the whole course of the year.

I copied Rubin's January resolution by stating the need to boost energy and I think 5 days into the new year I have been good at boosting my energy. Two nights ago I went to bed at 9pm and got 3 more hours of sleep than usual. All I have to say about that is that it is such a great feeling not being so groggy and getting a massive headache during the day. That experience was enough proof for me that the tedious work of the project actually pays off.



Yesterday in my psychology class we were talking about our new year goals- not necessarily our resolutions but what we would like to achieve this 2012. If we were to chose one thing, what would we want to accomplish by the end of the year. I decided on one thing: fight for yourself and stand up for your decisions; you don't need to listen to anyone else but yourself at this point in your life. Hopefully this goal will help me make the right college and career decisions and help me become more aggressive and determined.

This book inspired me to want to become a happier, healthier person without changing anything or anyone in my life. If you're ready to become a new improved you, well you know what you've got to do: pick up this book and take look. There's much inside to discover. You'll finish it in no time, cover to cover.













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http://www.happiness-project.com/TheHappinessProjectPB-large.png

Culturally Aesthestic

Here's a topic I rarely touch on: aesthetics. I was holiday shopping with my mom at Sephora, a cosmetics store similar to ULTA. She was looking for a particular brand of perfume. I wasn't looking around for anything since I rarely wear makeup or care to search for any beauty products for myself. Naturally, this left me to observe the handful of young and old women employees. They were all in the same uniform: black dress pants and blouse, most with very high heels. Their hair was either straightened or curled, nothing was natural. Most lips were glamoured with various shades of red lipstick and their eyes heavily brushed with shadow and mascara.

Don't get me wrong- they all looked pretty. But that is the point of makeup, right? Makeup for women is supposed to lift self-esteem and enhance the face. But sometimes I wonder what those women actually look like. They signed up to doll themselves up everyday, which would be a fun job, but I wonder if they ever get tired of having to put on all that makeup and dress like that everyday? I wish I could ask them how they feel when they wake up in the morning and look in the mirror. Is putting on makeup a way of hiding oneself from others? Is it a way to hide from oneself?

To what extent does modern culture affect the way young women choose to dress themselves? At beauty product stores like Sephora, most young women enter seaching for a product that will help them look better. Of course the employees need to display their products by putting it on themselves, but how much does it affect their customers? Do teenagers feel pressured to look like these women?

I also wonder how much this drives sales. My guess is that the women employees in the store who flaunt their products on their own bodies, convince their customers enough to buy those products and more. What I find most interesting however is that one look at a person can unconsciously have an effect on your own personal ways and habits.

"What a day for a daydream"

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-power-daydreaming/201001/how-work-your-daydreams

"I've been havin’ a sweet dream
I been dreamin’ since I woke up today
It’s starrin’ me and my sweet dream
Cause she's the one that makes me feel this way..." -Lovin Spoonful

Sometimes I catch my mind drifting, slowly but surely detaching itself from the present when suddenly and abruptly it's interrupted by reality. I daydream, like most people, about many different things. I'll think about what would happen if I were to just stand up on a table in the middle of a lecture and curse the teacher. Would anyone laugh? What would the expression on my teacher's face be? Would I ever actually have the guts to do it? But really, I have thought about this several times during some boring lectures. It's a thought that keeps me entertained and more importantly, awake.

Often times however, I daydream about very emotional experiences. Yesterday was the 3 year death anniversary of my grandma. Throughout that whole dreadful Monday, my mind kept wandering to the events that surrounded that same day 3 years previous. During all my morning classes, I could almost smell the flowers, feel the cold marble floor of the basilica under my feet, see a procession of cars all with the same red flag on their antennas, and practically hear my own weeping. A wave of sorrow took over me. Daydreams can be both positive and negative, and are powerful all the same.